January 6th & 7th

It's been a busy weekend, and I got a little behind. I do want to say again, that I'm not following this plan to check something off the list. Except that I do know that I'm the kind of person that needs to have a list that I can follow, so knowing that, maybe I am checking it off "the list". I feel like I was always told to not spend time reading the Bible as if it was something to check off. But then, if I didn't feel like reading the Bible, I wouldn't, because I didn't want to read if I had the wrong motives. I see the error in that now. I do think there are times we don't want to read, but need to. And even if that feels like checking something off, and even if I'm the kind of person that needs some structure and can't always just ask God to show me where to read from, that's ok. As long as I'm asking Him to do work in my heart no matter when I read. Learning lessons here. Daily, it feels like sometimes.

I'll do January 6th-7th today, January 8th-9th tomorrow, and January 10th-11th on Wednesday and that will be caught up. Feels good to have a feasible plan.

Genesis 13:5-18:19-
Lot and Abram split ways. Choose to live in separate areas of the land. Lot chooses near Sodom. It mentions that the men of Sodom are very wicked.
God promises to Abram that his descendants will be as numerous as the dust, and gives him the land to every side.
Then there are all these kings that go to war against each other. There are four kings that go to war against five other kings (including the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah). The four kings win out, and they take all the food and goods of Sodom and Gomorrah, as well as Abram's nephew Lot and his possessions, as they are living near Sodom. This is when Abram gets involved. He takes 318 trained men and went in pursuit. With those few men, he brings back Lot and his posessions. He gets a blessing my the King of Salem, Melchizedek, who says "Blessed be Abram by God Most High, Creator of heaven and earth. And blessed be God Most High, who delivered your enemies into your hand." Abram made sure not to keep anything from Sodom's plunder, as God had warned me not to do so, so that the king of Sodom could never say that Abram got rich because of him. This just reminds me of the idea that God is always looking for ways to bring glory to Himself. I used to think that this didn't make much sense, that it sounded a little bit selfish. But it was explained to me one time that not only is He the only one that deserves all the glory, but also that this could actually be God's way of protecting us from taking all the glory ourselves, because as imperfect and sinful human beings, we can't handle taking the glory. 
It's also at this time that God promises Abram that he will have a descendent from his own flesh that will gain his inheritance. This is a big promise, as Abram is well aged in years. Abram wants to know how he can be sure God is going to keep this promise. So God tells him to bring a sacrifice of a heifer, a goat and a ram, each three years old, and a dove and young pigeon. He cuts everything but the birds in half. The sun begins to set and Abram gets a deep sense of dread. God tells him that his descendants will be enslaved for 400 years, but will then be freed, and those that enslaved them will be punished. Abram's descendants will come out with great possessions. When it became dark, a "smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces" (ch. 15 vs. 17). This was God's way of saying He would make good on His promise.
However, Sarai, Abram's wife had never given him any children. She did have an Egyptian maidservant named Hagar, and she decided, instead of trusting in the Lord's promise, to take matters into her own hands and send Hagar to Abram so that he could have children with her. Abram agreed. But when Hagar got pregnant, she despised Sarai. This caused major tensions. Sarai blamed Abram, Abram told Sarai to do with her as she pleased, and Sarai mistreated her (who knows what that means) and so Hagar fled. An angel told Hagar to go back, however, and submit to Sarai, and that they would "so increase her descendants that they would be too numerous to count. The angel also told her that her son should be named Ishmael, and that "his hand would be against everyone and everyone's hand against him, and he will live in hostility toward all his brothers." 
Hagar then gave the LORD a name, which I think is just so cool. She says, "'You are the God who sees me', for she said, 'I have now seen the One who sees me.'" (ch. 16. v. 13) The God who sees me. How long had Hagar gone without someone really seeing her? She was a slave to Abram and Sarai, and was used without much thought to the harm it might do to her. She's sent to Abram to try and conceive a child that, as far as Sarai is concerned, is going to be who Sarai and Abram build a family through, leaving Hagar out of the picture (ch. 16. vs. 2). When Hagar does get pregnant, is obviously bitter about the situation, and then Sarai starts to mistreat her, God steps in. He sees Hagar in her flight. He sends an angel to meet her where she's at. The angel asks her two things. Where she's come from and where she's going. It's interesting to me that Hagar only answers the first question, that she's running from Sarai. Maybe she has no clue where she's going, which shows the desperation she had to get out of there. To be pregnant and have no idea where you're going, where you're going to get your sustenance, but to still flee. That's desperate. And then, to feel, perhaps at your loneliest, and have God step in. She knows that He sees her. And she gives Him the name El Roi, The God Who Sees. 
Hagar returned, and had Ishmael when Abram was 86 years old. God had a promise to keep, but in His timing. It wasn't until Abram was 99 years old that God said again he would confirm His covenant and greatly increase Abram's numbers. God changed his name to Abraham, which means father of many. He says He will be Abraham's God and the God of his descendants. God sets up the sign of the covenant between God and Abraham to be circumcision. Abraham is to undergo it, yes at his age, and all the generations to come, whether born in his household or bought with his money, must undergo it. God also changes Sarai's name to Sarah. God says he will surely give Abraham a son by her. Abraham's response? To fall facedown and...laugh! He laughs! He seems to think it's crazy for a 100 year old man and 90 year old woman to conceive a child, and asks if only Ishmael could receive the blessing. But God presses on, saying Sarah will have a son and they will call him Isaac. God does say that he will bless Ishmael, but it will be through Isaac that God will keep His covenant. All the men are circumcised.
Three men then visit Abraham and his wife, and say that by this time next year, Sarah will have borne a son. Sarah is the next one to laugh, and when asked why she does, she lies and said she didn't.

Matthew 5:27-6:24
Jesus is still speaking to the crowds at this point. He warns against adultery, outright and in your heart. He warns against letting your body sin against you. It also goes through some specifics on divorce and talks about the importance of keeping your oaths. Let your yes be yes and your no be no. There's no need to swear by something if you always keep your word. He continues on to talk about not getting revenge, or an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, but if someone strikes one cheek, turning the other to them, or giving someone your cloak as well if they sue you for your tunic. "'You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven.'" (ch. 5. vs. 43-45) It's not hard to love those that love you. That's what every does. Love even your enemies. "Be holy, as I am holy." (ch. 5 vs. 48) What a challenge. To pursue holiness as HE is holy. Isn't that impossible? In college I remember talking about the different stages. That once you choose to follow Jesus, you are redeemed, but may still struggle with lots of things. You then are to pursue holiness in your life, through the redemptive work of Christ and His power within you (not your own) to the point that your "bent" towards sinning is actually reversed. You aren't perfect, by any means, but that through Christ's transforming power, and His constant hand in your life and Spirit present at your side, your decisions and actions begin to reflect Him. You begin to look like him in word and deed. This is the point of Sanctification. It's not until Heaven that we reach Glorification, where we are made perfect and our bodies whole. 
He then follows this decree with a warning, to "Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven." (ch. 6 vs. 1) To strive to live a holy life isn't to gain recognition or admiration or praise from others, but to be obedient to God. Why is it so easy to let what others think of us dictate our actions, when our audiences are others and God. Isn't the choice obvious for who we should be aiming to please? It seems like it should be, but it's so easy to get caught up in letting myself worry about what others think of me, what I choose to do, what I hide from them. This may be a little cheesy, but the song is totally true, that we live for an Audience of One. There may be crowds surrounding us on a daily basis, but it's not their vote that matters. I think I could find so much freedom in this thought if I could just wrap my head around it. 
Don't announce you're giving, or your praying. It says not even so far as to let your right hand know what your left hand is doing. And I love this verse, "And when you pray, do not keep babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him." Freedom to not even be a perfect prayer! How many times do I need to remind myself of this? How often have I not prayed aloud in a group because of fear of men. LAME! Even God says not to be a babbler! I remember in high school getting papers back from Mrs. Hardy that said I was "fudge filling", as in, putting in extra stuff to make the paper look good instead of getting to the point. I don't want to, and I don't NEED to have fudge filled prayers. God totally knows what I'm going to ask before I pray, so he's obviously going to also know when I'm just filling in words. FREEDOM from long winded, babbling prayers! :) 

"This, then, is how you should pray: 
'Our Father in heaven, 
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our debts, 
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation, 
but deliver us from the evil one.'" (Ch. 6 Vs. 9-13)

Forgive those that sin against you, so God will forgive your sins. (vs. 14)
Don't look somber when you fast.
Don't store up treasures on earth. They don't last. They get eaten by lame things like moths and get covered with dust. Where your treasure is, your heart follows. Place your treasure in heaven!
Keep your eyes on good things. Your eyes are the lamp of your body. Don't let your body be full of darkness by letting your eyes go bad.
Don't let more than ONE THING control you. Two masters is impossible to serve. You have to choose. To have two is to put yourself in a position where you will love one of them and hate the other one. Don't make God one of those options. If it's between God and something else, choose God. Sounds like it should be obvious, but unfortunately, it isn't always.

Psalm 6:10
O LORD-
Do not rebuke me
Be merciful
Heal me
My soul is in anguish. How long?
Deliver me.
Your love is unfailing.
I'm worn out.
Weeping.
Sorrowful.
But my LORD has heard me.
He accepts my prayer.
My enemies will turn back.

Psalm 7:1-17
O LORD-
I take REFUGE in you
Save me.
Deliver me.
If there is guilt on me...
If I have done evil to another...
then let my enemies overtake me.
But Arise!
LORD, even if you are angry with me, awake!
Decree YOUR justice. The gracious kind. The justice that isn't fair.
For you save me, even in my sins.
You are MY SHIELD.
God Most High.
The same name King of Salem, Melchizedek, gives you.
God Most High.
He saves the "upright in heart".
God, search my heart.
I have sinned against you, but you are a righteous judge.
I dug a hole, and fell in it.
But I give THANKS that you are righteous, and I sing praises to your name.
LORD MOST HIGH.

Proverbs 1:29-33
Wisdom speaking again.
They hated knowledge.
Did not fear the LORD.
Spurned rebuke.
They will eat the fruit of their ways.
These are the results of their own choices.
"For the waywardness of the simple will kill them,
and the complacency of fools will destroy them;
but whoever listens to me will live in safety
and be at ease without fear of harm."

Proverbs 2:1-5
My son. My daughter.
Accept my words.
Store up my commandments.
Turn your ear to wisdom.
Call for insight.
Cry for understanding.
As if it were a treasure.
As precious as silver.
THEN you will understand the fear of the LORD.